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Blunderbuss Issue 1 (1977)

Here is the first ever issue of BLUNDERBUSS, albeit called "ECM" for its first two issues.

The Resume of Events article is typical of the general content of the magazine.

If anyone can identify which month this issue appeared please contact the Editors - our best guess is March 1977.

You can explore the Blunderbuss archive here.

Contents of Issue 1

Entertainments Committee

The Charity Committee

The Council

Resume of Events

Recipe of the Month

Film Society

Farnham College Football team

Redgrave Theatre: Table Manners



Entertainments Committee

Arnie (chairman: April 25 onwards)

Rosemary Bowsher

Min Hammerton-Fraser

Mike Mehta

David Phelan (chairman: October 1976 to April 25 1977, then consultant)

Jo Sheldon

Julian Wakefield-Harrey

Geoff Whiting

The Committee would like to thank Jackie Ward for her work in the past months and regret her resignation, which was due to lack of time.

My Lords, Ladies, and Gentlemen, the incredible, radical, liberal ... Ah well, at last we're here. Hopefully to stay.

E.C.M. - your magazine - has been set up for several reasons, not least to combat the apathy of Farnham College; something which cannot be achieved without your help.

In future issues we want to include YOUR views, YOUR poems, and anything else you would like to contribute. This magazine will be what you want to make it and if we are to publish monthly we will need your help.

If you want to say something so that everyone will hear it, see a member of E.C. and we will put it in the magazine, speaking of which, welcome to the first issue.

The Charity Committee

The Charity Committee is a body of 6 members appointed by the Council. The purpose of it is to raise funds for the various charitable projects in the name of the council. Until recently the charity supported was the Imperial Cancer Research Fund, but since an initiative by the Committee, the Council has voted to support local deserving projects. At the moment the charity Committee raises money for the staff and visitors dining-room furniture at the Phyllis Tuckwell Hospice, formerly Trimmers hospital. The Charity Committee raises money in various ways. We run jumble sales, raffles and stalls in fetes outside the college. Internally, we occasionally receive disco profits, hold the second-hand shop, cake and sweet sales and collections.       

James Campbell

The Council

The council isn't a student union. If only more students would realize that we have opted for something much more exciting: participation in decision making as a step towards student power. The only method to achieve this is by proving that the council is running itself as democratically and efficiently as possible. I wish the L. Sixth the best of luck in the continuing struggle to achieve this, and trust that the new senior council never forgets that they must not become absorbed into the college Establishment. The Ents. Com. has provided a lucid demonstration of the ability of 6th form students to create their own forms of democratic organisation.

Nicholas Gregory (Chairman, The Council)

Resume of Events

In this resume I hope to relive a few of those horrible memories of events brought to you by the Entertainments Committee over the last term - those unforgettable moment carved out of the mighty sculpture of time itself and set in the corridors of the universe for all to behold - until at least half past two.  

We began the autumn term by subjecting students to an introductory disco. It was certainly memorable, if only for the moment when Mike Mehta discovered who put the “bop” in the “be-du-bop-de-bop” and two young ladies told him exactly what he could do with it. Most were agreed that the disco was a massive success (especially Dave Phelan, Geoff Whiting, Arnie and Mike Mehta).

The next disco was even better. It was the Christmas disco at which some amazing things happened under the mistletoe, and under a desk in room 15. Although somewhat crowded nothing stopped students getting into heavy rock or David Phelan’s trousers. (David Phelan would like to thank Sue, Liz, Pat and Caroline for their supports). Cries of “let’s do it” from Arnie produced several surprises and three students are still at the Yard helping Police with their enquiries.

The Entertainments Committee (who?) also “constructed” the Christmas postbox – in which students put Christmas cards to their friends, empty whisky bottles and anything else they could lay their hands on. Although some students are still waiting for their Christmas cards this is due to a technical fault (known as Mike Mehta) and these cards will be delivered if we find them the time.

The Christmas festivities came and passed and soon there were cries of "Roll on'77" and “Roll on Rosemary” and it all happened. The first great event of 1977 was the Skating Trip to Richmond: an event at which Geoff Whiting changed his outlook on life and Arnie changed his socks. Two coaches were 'hired' (know what I mean John?} for the evening and very soon they were off. Later the coaches left the College. Both the coaches were packed, although I must take this opportunity to deny reports that Chris Hunt was tied to the coach with a rope and had to run along behind – it was not Chris Hunt at, it was Peter Capewell (still recovering under the bar at the William Cobbett).

The evening went well and there were only three deaths (not including students who threw themselves from the moving coach when Mike Mehta undid his top shirt button on the way home).

The next marvellous event was another school disco, which was as enjoyable as anything in living memory (eg. World War II and the Russell Harty show). I must point out here that the Entertainments Committee in fact received a note of congratulations on its handling from Mr McGlaughlin himself. (NB Arnie's signature forging lessons now available for only £1).

What could there be to follow this? ... Yes! Another skating trip (cries of “pass another boiled egg, please"). Unfortunately we didn't get the surgical support we wanted for this event, but due to an unofficial loan from  Barclays Bank (“know what I mean, John?”) The trip went ahead and was enjoyed by both the students who went.

On Feb. the 14th. the Ents. Com. didn't forget the students (especially Sue and Jackie - see you Friday at the Alma). but did forget to make the valentines day postbox - fortunately expert artist, potter, sculptor, odd-jobs man and rock guitarist Julian Wakefield-H worked wonders with an old cornflakes box mind you his eyes are a bit poor and the lights were low.) Later, he made the post-box as well. All the cards were delivered safely (probably to the wrong people, though).  

By the time you read the article the Equus theatre trip, the bowling trip and the end of term disco, will just be horrible memories. So, to sum up, the Ents.Com. have tried their best to refresh the parts that others cannot reach, especially Mike Mehta who has never been the same since the incident with the barmaid at the Coach and Horses).

We hope we have succeeded in dispelling at least some of the apathy that soaks into the very fibre of college life so rapidly; we shall continue to do so as long as we can and we hope you will support us in our aims (to have free beer on council funds).

PS: Rumours that the above was written by Mike Mehta’s dog after a bowl of whisky are completely unfounded.

PPS LOST DOG: The entertainments com. Wish to locate a small brown dog, smelling of whisky and carrying a biro between its teeth as soon as possible – contact Mike Mehta

Recipe of the Month

Farnham College Crispy Cake

4 oz. Butter

4 oz. Icing sugar

4 tablespoons cocoa

4 tablespoons golden syrup

6 oz. cornflakes

Handful of sultanas and glace cherries

Add some nuts if wanted

Heap it all, except cornflakes and fruit, into saucepan. Heat gently, stirring occasionally. Bring to the boil, for 1 minute - no longer or else you'll need a chisel to eat it with. Stir in cornflakes and fruit. Press firmly into two oiled 7” cake tins. Chill in refrigerator until set. Eat.


Note: Entertainments Committee new indigestion tablets available shortly - 50p each. (Apologies for high price, but this is due to the increased price of tail of frog, wing of bat and wallet of David Phelan.)

Film Society

Last autumn term saw the fourth founding of the Farnham College Film Society - thanks to the support of Mr Wolverson, Jon Knight, Tim O'Dell, Ian Richards (alias "the boff"), Gill Fox, Arnie and all the other founder members.

The season began with "The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner" (black and white). Next was "Battleship Potemkin" (yes - an epic in black and white and no sound!). This was followed by "The caretaker" (the best part of which was the coffee and broken biscuits in the interval). However, success eventually arrived on the screen with "Catch 22" and "M.A.S.H." With the extra revenue three more films have now been selected and order for the Summer Term. These will be "If", "Cabaret" and "They Shoot Horses Don't They."

Remember, the more support there is for each individual film the better the future programme. Support "Pandy Productions Incorporated" - it's your Film Society.

M. Mouse

Farnham College Football Team

The Season began well with victories against Farnborough VI Form and Salesian College and the team were confident of a successful season. The highlight of the first term has to be the rousing 6-2 win against Selhurst, Croydon when the ream played some of its best football. St John the Baptist, Shene, Sutton Manor School were all beaten as Farnham marched impressively into the final of the County Cup.

The reward for this early success was a place in the English Schools under 19 Trophy Competition. Farnham beat Presentation College 3-1 in the first round but were eliminated 2-0 by Roan School London in the second.

This in many ways marked a turning point in the Season from a position of being well nigh unbeatable Farnham lost to Sandham, Collingwood and turned in some rather patchy performances. Collingwood after inflicting the only League defeat on the ream rubbed salt into the wound somewhat by beating the College 1-0 in the quarter final of the County six a side Competition and this after Farnham had scored 13 goals against John Ruskin in the previous round.

After much delay the final of the County Cup was played at Sutton against Glyn School, Farnham losing 2-1. Retrospectively Farnham were desperately unlucky - dominating the fame for long periods and having two goals disallowed. But the result stands and a third trophy had drifted away.

At the time of going to press Farnham had one opportunity to salvage a trophy - this in the league championship play of on Friday 1.4.77 against Eastfields school.

On the brighter side, most of the college side had played together at this level for two years but the injection of new blood in the guise of Richard Henderson and Mark Foster certainly strengthened the squad. As yet Farnham has won no trophies this season but the quality of its football has not gone unnoticed. Groves, Webb, Whiting, Foster, Lawrence and Haswell all representing the County team.

A special mention due to Hugh Groves in his second season as captain of the side in this his benefit year, and to all the other players Watson, Slinger, Langridge, Peters, Probert, Gibbons and Cross, not previously mentioned in this article. The team has worked hard and sacrificed a great deal of free time and deserve a vote of thanks from the college. A final mention for Mr Grogut for his tireless work behind the scenes.



Rear cover of the Entertainments Committee issue 1 advertising the Redgrave TheatreRedgrave Theatre: Table Manners by Alan Ayckbourn

(At the Redgrave until April 16)

Blunderbuss issue 1 rear coverTable Manners is the first of Alan Ayckbourn's trilogy of plays, The Norman Conquests. The plays present three views of the same house over the same weekend, each set in a difference room. Each of the plays is however complete and self-sufficient.

Table Manners is set in the dining room! The plot is simple and direct, but Mr Ayckbourn extracts as much humour from the situation as is humanly possible.

Sarah and Reg, a married couple, with two children, visit Reg's mother's house to take charge while Annie goes away for the weekend in east Grinstead. When Sarah discovers that this is to be a dirty weekend with NORMAN, Sarah's married brother-in-law she refuses to let Annie go. Norman arrives to a frosty reception and then the local wet/vet Tom, a prospective suitor for Annie also wanders in. Following a rowdy evening, at breakfast nobody talks to Norman, except himself.

The plot thickens when Ruth, Norman's career minded wife appears on the scene. The following scenes are hilariously funny, especially as family arguments with which we are all familiar arise. The dining table scene in Act II has to be seen to be believed. In all the play keeps you in fits throughout as it is above all a farce involving all the different types of people one comes across in everyday life.

The Salads served up at meals provide an interesting discussion on insectology, while over the breakfast table such dynamic topics as pinking shears are discussed.

Ayckbourn always said that to laugh at his plays you should have been kicked in the stomach by Life first. Well, I haven't been (yet) and I loved it.

I haven't seen any of the present Redgrave company before. I sincerely hope we will see more of them in the future. The characters were all complete, deep and competently portrayed. The essence of playing Ayckbourn is naturalism; this production at the Redgrave has that quality and consequently it works splendidly. Norman says "I'm a three-a-day man - I've just been born in the wrong body".

The play runs until April 16, test your stamina against Norman's.

Director: David Horlock

Min Hammerton-Fraser and David Phelan


Cover design by Min H-F.

Help and advice gratefully received from Mrs. Brown. THANK YOU!

Tea and buns by Mr. McLaughlin.

Desk work generously supplied by Rosemary Bowsher ... (Ring Runsfold 36 24 36)

Thanks and congratulations from Geoff, Arnie, Mike, Eric and David.

Errors by Mrtin Collier,.=½!